First, I would like to suggest that working out childhood issues is rarely beneficial unless both parties in the discussion are willing to let go of the pain. The dysfunctional norm we operate under needs to show the pain and explain the pain to the other. All that does is bring the pain from the past zooming in to the present. This makes it alive again without resolving anything. In that type of discussion, everyone’s walls are up and solidly resisting the negative energy from the other.
The best way to resolve this in enlightened families is for both parties to acknowledge that life is a series of events. These events happen to guide us and open us up to the Light. During that journey, we will be exposed to the Dark energies that surround us. This happens so that we may experience them, know them, and then choose to move past them. A family that is spiritually growing has to at some point choose to move past the Darkness stage. This family must move to knowing the Light.
The journey getting there is no fun and hardships happen on all sides for all members of a family or friends. But the family endure this because that is the journey to know Darkness. The people themselves are good people. They are not the Darkness. The Darkness is separate and is an energy surrounding, encasing, good people. The situations themselves are not the people, and the negative energy itself is not the people. We are all working our way back to our pure natural state of pure light. Along the way, we will all carry burdens of Darkness, until we release them.
Once we acknowledge the above, then the next step is to acknowledge that Karma is balanced or unbalanced all the time by our day-to-day actions. Having family talks/releases of pent up pain does not balance the Karma unless everyone drops all resistance and judgement. Everyone must accepts unquestioning and unchallenging all that is shared. Family and friend must know that from the others perspective that is how they see things. From my experience, this is a very hard task. It is very easy to start defending, defending some more and counter arguing and so forth… Each member of the family/friends who were on the defensive then start to list their resentments, and historic issues come to the surface. This is in an attempt to not be seen as such a bad person as the other sees you as, and on goes the cycle. In this scenario, nothing reduces the Karma.
The fact is that we each planned our lives before we were born. We planned just how much Darkness we would be exposed to, how, why, when, and by whom. To be enlightened means to acknowledge that, and to not try to find some slippery excuse to forget that truth. If there is anyone to be angry at, it is with ourselves, our Souls, our Guides and our Angels. All of these beings helped us plan our lives. They are the ones who are keeping us on track to accomplish all that we set out to accomplish. Much as it might be hard to acknowledge, we must give the other actors in our life’s play a standing ovation for playing their part so well.
In an enlightened family, everybody would understand the above well. If someone had something bothering them, then instead of bringing the past roaring back into the present, all that person would need to do is go to the other Human Being whom the issue is with. One would then let them know that there is an issue that needs healing, Karma that needs balancing, emotions safely released. Then they would resolve to do on the issues. Do this without going into any details or anything at all, without confrontation, with the intent to heal this for everyone involved. Maybe the Ho’oponopono is done together or alone. The idea is that both sides would do it to heal the energy between each other and free each other. If both sides are not available for any reason then you should take on the task as a gift both to yourself and to the other.
It is not necessary for you to understand your childhood traumas or to have the insights of what happened when. Most Humans do not trust the Light and that is why their healing happens after they get insights. They want to understand things before they let the Light take action. The truth is that the insights can happen on levels far deeper than our conscious mind. Ask your Guides and Angels to only give you the bare minimum of conscious insights so that they release you from all this processing all the time. That is punishment in itself. Be free of it. Trust the Light to take care of you. Furthermore, trust your Soul to get the lessons without the conscious mind being involved. With the above in place, one can achieve healings, releases and spiritual growth oh so much more smoothly.
Since we are not all perfect yet, Spiritual healing energies can help a great deal with Family Dynamics. To help people get along again. If left to fester, parents and children issues, young and old, builds long-term repercussions.